Day 75: Real Time
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
My oft-repeated Day 1 yesterday was moving day. My mother is moving in with me, and friends with trucks showed up at the appointed time to transfer furniture 5 blocks. Of course, it doesn’t matter how far (or short) the distance is when you’re moving. It’s still a lot of work!
Some things went to storage…a lot of things, actually….and the furniture was arranged this way and that here in the house.
Kind of like the rest of our lives, don’t you think? We start out one way when we’re young, move forward and then often back, hopefully always learning along the way. Those folks who remain stuck in "I'm an adult and know everything there is to know, so leave me alone" mode miss so much.
Day 2 ahead!
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Friday, July 30, 2010
Day 74
Day 74: Real Time
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Yep. Day 1 again.
And I’m not even upset about it. Certainly not COMPLAINING about it, either!
I sat in the predawn silence this morning, waiting for the sun to even think about rising, and considered how much I was going to tattle on myself today.
Heck…let’s be honest. I even considered not telling on myself at all.
How would you know? Who else would whisper in your ear that I had slipped…just a tiny slip….yesterday, and in effect “spoil” my recent success on my way to 21 days complaint free?
The answer is that this journal is for me, not you. I’m sharing my trials with you in order to keep me honest, accountable to the one I have to look at in the mirror every morning. I am honored that many of you have taken me by the hand and are walking with me every step of the way. And it’s turning out to be a very long way, isn't it?
The details that have caused me to return to the starting post aren’t unique in any way. The sporting goods store wasn’t where the map indicated it was. I drove up and down the designated street on the other side of the bridge looking for it, back and forth, here and there. My cell phone had been forgotten and was back at home, laughing at me, I’m sure, a device that has taken on almost superhuman powers for most of us. I never found the store, didn’t get the item that was only on sale one more day, it was HOT, and I was….well, let’s just say a tad irritated. You have faced hundreds of similar situations yourself, just insert your own details, and there you go.
I was alone, but simply had to lambaste the mapmakers, the store employees, the store ownership, the bridge, the makers of the road that was so crowded at that time of day, the heat, the storm that was approaching…you name it, I threw it in the pot of complaint stew to the next people that presented themselves in my space.
BUT….the tirade didn’t last as long as it would have even a month ago. I didn’t carry on until I started to hyperventilate like I used to. I only “shared” the story once.
I’m getting better. I really am. I’m happy with my progress and I do understand that this journey is for life. Literally….my life. A better one than I’ve had in the recent past.
And that’s worth being honest about, don’t you think? I hope you’re not upset with me, hope that you won’t abandon me. I need all the sympathetic hands to hold that I can get.
Both today, Day 1, and tomorrow, whatever number that turns out to be.
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Yep. Day 1 again.
And I’m not even upset about it. Certainly not COMPLAINING about it, either!
I sat in the predawn silence this morning, waiting for the sun to even think about rising, and considered how much I was going to tattle on myself today.
Heck…let’s be honest. I even considered not telling on myself at all.
How would you know? Who else would whisper in your ear that I had slipped…just a tiny slip….yesterday, and in effect “spoil” my recent success on my way to 21 days complaint free?
The answer is that this journal is for me, not you. I’m sharing my trials with you in order to keep me honest, accountable to the one I have to look at in the mirror every morning. I am honored that many of you have taken me by the hand and are walking with me every step of the way. And it’s turning out to be a very long way, isn't it?
The details that have caused me to return to the starting post aren’t unique in any way. The sporting goods store wasn’t where the map indicated it was. I drove up and down the designated street on the other side of the bridge looking for it, back and forth, here and there. My cell phone had been forgotten and was back at home, laughing at me, I’m sure, a device that has taken on almost superhuman powers for most of us. I never found the store, didn’t get the item that was only on sale one more day, it was HOT, and I was….well, let’s just say a tad irritated. You have faced hundreds of similar situations yourself, just insert your own details, and there you go.
I was alone, but simply had to lambaste the mapmakers, the store employees, the store ownership, the bridge, the makers of the road that was so crowded at that time of day, the heat, the storm that was approaching…you name it, I threw it in the pot of complaint stew to the next people that presented themselves in my space.
BUT….the tirade didn’t last as long as it would have even a month ago. I didn’t carry on until I started to hyperventilate like I used to. I only “shared” the story once.
I’m getting better. I really am. I’m happy with my progress and I do understand that this journey is for life. Literally….my life. A better one than I’ve had in the recent past.
And that’s worth being honest about, don’t you think? I hope you’re not upset with me, hope that you won’t abandon me. I need all the sympathetic hands to hold that I can get.
Both today, Day 1, and tomorrow, whatever number that turns out to be.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Day 73
Day 73: Real Time
Day 17: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Complaining is easy.
Getting involved to effect change in areas that irritate, infuriate, and generally cause us angst is much more difficult.
It sounds simple, doesn’t it? And maybe it IS that simple. But I’ve lived a long time in the arena of trying to make a difference.
I think in some areas I HAVE made a difference. However, in others, it seems the same wheel keeps on turnin’ and not much has changed.
We all have a choice, though. We can continue to try to make things better, or we can step back and let younger minds and bodies take over the fight.
But, that choice doesn’t mean we can’t still participate in less strenuous ways, like writing letters, passing our hard-fought knowledge along, and posting blogs.
However, the choice doesn’t give us a free pass to merely complain. The kind of whining that has no real purpose or hope of any possible positive result. (And it gives old people a REALLY bad rap!)
So, the premise stated earlier sounds simple. It’s much less so in practice, as are most worthwhile things on this particular plane of existence.
Day 17.
Day 17: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Complaining is easy.
Getting involved to effect change in areas that irritate, infuriate, and generally cause us angst is much more difficult.
It sounds simple, doesn’t it? And maybe it IS that simple. But I’ve lived a long time in the arena of trying to make a difference.
I think in some areas I HAVE made a difference. However, in others, it seems the same wheel keeps on turnin’ and not much has changed.
We all have a choice, though. We can continue to try to make things better, or we can step back and let younger minds and bodies take over the fight.
But, that choice doesn’t mean we can’t still participate in less strenuous ways, like writing letters, passing our hard-fought knowledge along, and posting blogs.
However, the choice doesn’t give us a free pass to merely complain. The kind of whining that has no real purpose or hope of any possible positive result. (And it gives old people a REALLY bad rap!)
So, the premise stated earlier sounds simple. It’s much less so in practice, as are most worthwhile things on this particular plane of existence.
Day 17.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Day 72
Day 72: Real Time
Day 16: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Yesterday I was thinking back over the 72 days I’ve been at this, trying to remember exactly what was going on in my life in late May. The level of stress and just plain sadness was overwhelming, which might lead one to ask, “What were you thinking? Why start such a difficult experiment in the midst of all of that??”
Good question, on the face of it.
Unbidden, however, the next thought was, “What better time?”
Things have calmed to some degree in my life, but I also understand that difficulties are part of the deal. We get ourselves into lots of trouble when we expect life to be easy and happy and unburdened.
I have a postcard on my refrigerator, a quote from Mother Theresa: “God will never give us more than we can handle. I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.”
What a woman.
I’m on the home stretch….Day 16!
Day 16: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Yesterday I was thinking back over the 72 days I’ve been at this, trying to remember exactly what was going on in my life in late May. The level of stress and just plain sadness was overwhelming, which might lead one to ask, “What were you thinking? Why start such a difficult experiment in the midst of all of that??”
Good question, on the face of it.
Unbidden, however, the next thought was, “What better time?”
Things have calmed to some degree in my life, but I also understand that difficulties are part of the deal. We get ourselves into lots of trouble when we expect life to be easy and happy and unburdened.
I have a postcard on my refrigerator, a quote from Mother Theresa: “God will never give us more than we can handle. I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.”
What a woman.
I’m on the home stretch….Day 16!
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Day 71
Day 71: Real Time
Day 15: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I received a message yesterday from a follower of this blog, asking for clarification of what a complaint really is. She had read a comment I posted on someone else’s update on Facebook and thought perhaps it was actually a complaint.
And therein lays the most difficult part of this journey.
Is any negative comment a complaint?
Can we share our thoughts and feelings without sliding down the cliff of complaining, without having to move our purple bracelets and starting over again?
My advice, STRONG advice, is that you must read Will Bowen’s book before you even contemplate going down this road. And then read it again. You might even get it on CD and listen to it in the car, more than once.
He makes the point, one of many that you need to know, is that we are each responsible for our own trip. We will have enough to worry about without wondering if someone else is slipping. And I don’t say this to admonish the person who messaged me. I say it because I believe that only the originator of a statement knows how their words are intended, how they made someone else feel, and how they themselves felt internally after saying them.
Here’s an example: I don’t consider this a complaint FROM ME: “The line is moving really slowly.” End of statement. I wasn’t feeling any negative side effects of the statement, and I don’t think anyone else was, either.
However, it becomes a complaint like this: “The line is moving really slowly. What the heck is wrong up there? This $#%@& business needs to train their people better…they’re all morons!” And my blood pressure rises the whole time I’m griping. I finish out of breath and heaven forbid anyone get even a tad too close to me before I get out of that store. Plus, everyone who is listening to me is being negatively affected by my rant.
In other words, my complaining is often the result of not knowing when to stop. I have a great deal of stress in my life right now, and I often find that I use innocuous situations as an outlet for frustration and fear. I go overboard. I fall off the cliff and my bracelet is lucky to even make it back up with me in one piece.
So, not every negative utterance is a complaint. At least I don’t believe it is. If that was the case, we would all have to become mute, wouldn’t we?
We need to monitor our own complaining, and do the best we can every day. I think this is the larger benefit than going 21 days (or 5 or 50) without complaining. We are aware of what we are saying and we are mindful of how we are affecting others and ourselves.
I’d love to hear what the rest of you think. But I do ask that you read “A Complaint Free World” first. Then we’ll talk.
Day 15.
Day 15: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I received a message yesterday from a follower of this blog, asking for clarification of what a complaint really is. She had read a comment I posted on someone else’s update on Facebook and thought perhaps it was actually a complaint.
And therein lays the most difficult part of this journey.
Is any negative comment a complaint?
Can we share our thoughts and feelings without sliding down the cliff of complaining, without having to move our purple bracelets and starting over again?
My advice, STRONG advice, is that you must read Will Bowen’s book before you even contemplate going down this road. And then read it again. You might even get it on CD and listen to it in the car, more than once.
He makes the point, one of many that you need to know, is that we are each responsible for our own trip. We will have enough to worry about without wondering if someone else is slipping. And I don’t say this to admonish the person who messaged me. I say it because I believe that only the originator of a statement knows how their words are intended, how they made someone else feel, and how they themselves felt internally after saying them.
Here’s an example: I don’t consider this a complaint FROM ME: “The line is moving really slowly.” End of statement. I wasn’t feeling any negative side effects of the statement, and I don’t think anyone else was, either.
However, it becomes a complaint like this: “The line is moving really slowly. What the heck is wrong up there? This $#%@& business needs to train their people better…they’re all morons!” And my blood pressure rises the whole time I’m griping. I finish out of breath and heaven forbid anyone get even a tad too close to me before I get out of that store. Plus, everyone who is listening to me is being negatively affected by my rant.
In other words, my complaining is often the result of not knowing when to stop. I have a great deal of stress in my life right now, and I often find that I use innocuous situations as an outlet for frustration and fear. I go overboard. I fall off the cliff and my bracelet is lucky to even make it back up with me in one piece.
So, not every negative utterance is a complaint. At least I don’t believe it is. If that was the case, we would all have to become mute, wouldn’t we?
We need to monitor our own complaining, and do the best we can every day. I think this is the larger benefit than going 21 days (or 5 or 50) without complaining. We are aware of what we are saying and we are mindful of how we are affecting others and ourselves.
I’d love to hear what the rest of you think. But I do ask that you read “A Complaint Free World” first. Then we’ll talk.
Day 15.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Day 70
Day 70: Real Time
Day 14: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
"Often we allow ourselves to get all worked up about things that, upon closer examination, aren't really that big a deal. We focus on little problems and concerns and blow them way out of proportion.....Rather than let it go, and go on with our day, we convince ourselves that we are justified in our anger. We play out an imaginary confrontation in our mind. Many of us even tell someone else about the incident later on rather than simply let it go." Richard Carlson, "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...and It's All Small Stuff."
It's amazing to me how these bits of wisdom show up on my doorstep at exactly the right time. I can justify my anger with the best of them, and generally I am compelled to share it with a nearby ear.
Once I do that, however, I am no longer living the present moment. I am stuck in the past, reliving the irritation over and over again. Those car repairs keep driving by, shooting out the windows of whatever calm I might have finally achieved. Previous conversations with irritating folks get stuck in a groove, skipping over the good that is happening right in front of me.
I must be getting more adept at avoiding the drama, though. I'm beginning Day 14 on my 21 day quest. The quest that is actually one of a life of honoring the present moment.
Day 14: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
"Often we allow ourselves to get all worked up about things that, upon closer examination, aren't really that big a deal. We focus on little problems and concerns and blow them way out of proportion.....Rather than let it go, and go on with our day, we convince ourselves that we are justified in our anger. We play out an imaginary confrontation in our mind. Many of us even tell someone else about the incident later on rather than simply let it go." Richard Carlson, "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...and It's All Small Stuff."
It's amazing to me how these bits of wisdom show up on my doorstep at exactly the right time. I can justify my anger with the best of them, and generally I am compelled to share it with a nearby ear.
Once I do that, however, I am no longer living the present moment. I am stuck in the past, reliving the irritation over and over again. Those car repairs keep driving by, shooting out the windows of whatever calm I might have finally achieved. Previous conversations with irritating folks get stuck in a groove, skipping over the good that is happening right in front of me.
I must be getting more adept at avoiding the drama, though. I'm beginning Day 14 on my 21 day quest. The quest that is actually one of a life of honoring the present moment.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Day 69
Day 69: Real Time
Day 13: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
A word has been coming to me a lot over the past few days, one that speaks to this path of non-complaining : Graciousness.
A lot of what goes on around us currently epitomizes what educators call a non-example of this word, I think. Graciousness to me conveys an image of polite society, speaking softly and smiling when someone behaves badly. Being gracious gives others the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they were never taught any better or their rude comments were the result of poor language skills, we can hope.
In any case, grace under fire has become a lost art. Our tendency is to lash out at someone who is comporting themselves with a lack of dignity. And thus we join their ranks pretty quickly, don’t we? We jump on the complaining bandwagon with an air of smugness. We justify it with, “They started it, didn’t they?”
I plan on adding graciousness to my silent mantra as I move through the day.
My lucky 13th , I hope!
Day 13: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
A word has been coming to me a lot over the past few days, one that speaks to this path of non-complaining : Graciousness.
A lot of what goes on around us currently epitomizes what educators call a non-example of this word, I think. Graciousness to me conveys an image of polite society, speaking softly and smiling when someone behaves badly. Being gracious gives others the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they were never taught any better or their rude comments were the result of poor language skills, we can hope.
In any case, grace under fire has become a lost art. Our tendency is to lash out at someone who is comporting themselves with a lack of dignity. And thus we join their ranks pretty quickly, don’t we? We jump on the complaining bandwagon with an air of smugness. We justify it with, “They started it, didn’t they?”
I plan on adding graciousness to my silent mantra as I move through the day.
My lucky 13th , I hope!
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Day 68
Day 68: Real Time
Day 12: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I always said I would never do another garage sale. And here I am, sitting on the driveway with all that stuff surrounding me. Some people drive by, peer, and drive on. Others want to buy the hammer I inadvertently left on the table. Not the items with the price tags…..just the hammer.
But it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood and we did sell some things yesterday.
A friend came by who I haven’t seen in a while, too. It was good to catch up with our news, some of which involved the recent clashes I’ve had with a new employer. I told her the basics, and then stopped myself in time, I think. So I kept the taint from soiling us for the rest of the day.
Day 12.
Day 12: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I always said I would never do another garage sale. And here I am, sitting on the driveway with all that stuff surrounding me. Some people drive by, peer, and drive on. Others want to buy the hammer I inadvertently left on the table. Not the items with the price tags…..just the hammer.
But it’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood and we did sell some things yesterday.
A friend came by who I haven’t seen in a while, too. It was good to catch up with our news, some of which involved the recent clashes I’ve had with a new employer. I told her the basics, and then stopped myself in time, I think. So I kept the taint from soiling us for the rest of the day.
Day 12.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Day 67
Day 67: Real Time
Day 11: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The bagel helped yesterday morning. I’m sure it sped me through the preparations for the garage sale, its carb-filled comfort coursing through my body. And the calories were worked off by the end of the day, sweat dripping from my brow and brightly colored pricing dots stuck to my shoes.
After hitting the bagel shop, though, I first arrived at my meeting for work. One of my co-workers had read my column and mentioned that she had experienced a car repair situation much like the one I faced two days ago. My body kicked into high alert. I could feel it. I wanted to jump on the “mechanic bashing” train as it whistled through the room. My ticket was punched and I was anxious to leave the station.
And then I jerked myself off the boarding platform. Just in time.
I knew what would happen if I opened my mouth, even one tiny little bit. I knew I wouldn’t be able to control the tirade that would fuel the train, probably for a good chunk of time before we sat down to work.
So, I smiled and nodded. And the train left quietly without either of us on board.
There’s a huge lesson here for all of us who hope to live with a tad more grace and dignity every day. I controlled that situation through my awareness of it. All of us at the table might have spent some time sharing our individual auto repair debacles, but the result would not have added anything positive or worthy to the rest of our day. Our attitudes would have been tilted toward the negative, and none of that would have helped do our jobs better. In fact, it would have been the contrary.
Day 11 (almost) dawns!
Day 11: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The bagel helped yesterday morning. I’m sure it sped me through the preparations for the garage sale, its carb-filled comfort coursing through my body. And the calories were worked off by the end of the day, sweat dripping from my brow and brightly colored pricing dots stuck to my shoes.
After hitting the bagel shop, though, I first arrived at my meeting for work. One of my co-workers had read my column and mentioned that she had experienced a car repair situation much like the one I faced two days ago. My body kicked into high alert. I could feel it. I wanted to jump on the “mechanic bashing” train as it whistled through the room. My ticket was punched and I was anxious to leave the station.
And then I jerked myself off the boarding platform. Just in time.
I knew what would happen if I opened my mouth, even one tiny little bit. I knew I wouldn’t be able to control the tirade that would fuel the train, probably for a good chunk of time before we sat down to work.
So, I smiled and nodded. And the train left quietly without either of us on board.
There’s a huge lesson here for all of us who hope to live with a tad more grace and dignity every day. I controlled that situation through my awareness of it. All of us at the table might have spent some time sharing our individual auto repair debacles, but the result would not have added anything positive or worthy to the rest of our day. Our attitudes would have been tilted toward the negative, and none of that would have helped do our jobs better. In fact, it would have been the contrary.
Day 11 (almost) dawns!
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Day 66
Day 66: Real Journey
Day 10!: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I have reached the first double digit day.
It’s one of those landmarks that we all circle on our calendars in fat, red marker, like the year my daughter turned 10 or once when I made it this far in a marriage. (Oh, wait…that never happened…..I got carried away for a minute.)
And like most of the previous 65 days, it hasn’t been easy. My recent car repair wasn’t. Repaired, I mean. The traffic lights coming back from getting it “repaired” again were out of synch during the 5:00 PM rush hour. The shop that “repaired” it refused to negotiate on splitting the cost of the “new” repair. Yes, the one for the same issue I took it in for and it wasn’t…repaired.
My blood pressure shot up. I started to hyperventilate. And then I took a deep breath and explained my position. In other words, I complained to the person who had the ability to right the wrong. I did it calmly, and without personal attack.
The owner explained hers. I saw her point, but she never acknowledged mine. We weren’t going to agree. I paid and left. Sometimes a fight just isn’t worth the stress.
So, before this anti-complaining recording of my day turns into a rambling gripe of its own, let’s just say that it was a miracle I made it to this double digit milestone.
I guess I wanted it really bad. Like anything worthwhile, it took discipline and commitment.
Today I’ll be attending a creative meeting for work and then getting ready for the big garage sale tomorrow. The one to get rid of enough stuff for my mother to move into my house at the end of the month. I’m remembering that there’s a reason I haven’t moved in over 20 years.
Maybe Day 11 won’t be quite as challenging as yesterday. I think I need a huge bagel first to help me on my way, though. Just in case.
Day 10!: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I have reached the first double digit day.
It’s one of those landmarks that we all circle on our calendars in fat, red marker, like the year my daughter turned 10 or once when I made it this far in a marriage. (Oh, wait…that never happened…..I got carried away for a minute.)
And like most of the previous 65 days, it hasn’t been easy. My recent car repair wasn’t. Repaired, I mean. The traffic lights coming back from getting it “repaired” again were out of synch during the 5:00 PM rush hour. The shop that “repaired” it refused to negotiate on splitting the cost of the “new” repair. Yes, the one for the same issue I took it in for and it wasn’t…repaired.
My blood pressure shot up. I started to hyperventilate. And then I took a deep breath and explained my position. In other words, I complained to the person who had the ability to right the wrong. I did it calmly, and without personal attack.
The owner explained hers. I saw her point, but she never acknowledged mine. We weren’t going to agree. I paid and left. Sometimes a fight just isn’t worth the stress.
So, before this anti-complaining recording of my day turns into a rambling gripe of its own, let’s just say that it was a miracle I made it to this double digit milestone.
I guess I wanted it really bad. Like anything worthwhile, it took discipline and commitment.
Today I’ll be attending a creative meeting for work and then getting ready for the big garage sale tomorrow. The one to get rid of enough stuff for my mother to move into my house at the end of the month. I’m remembering that there’s a reason I haven’t moved in over 20 years.
Maybe Day 11 won’t be quite as challenging as yesterday. I think I need a huge bagel first to help me on my way, though. Just in case.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Day 65
Day 65: Real Time
Day 9: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The young man behind the counter at the convenience store watched as I approached his station. This particular store is across the street from my gym, and I’ve fallen into the habit of stopping to get a cold drink as soon as finish working out each day. It’s that “Wow! Aren’t I proud of myself? I need a reward” mentality that gets people like me into trouble with food or shopping or other less savory addictions. Like complaining.
“How’s your day goin’?” the young man said as I handed him my loose change.
I could have told him. And a few months ago I might have “shared” the fun I had been having all day.
“I’ll answer you this way,” I said. “I’m on a quest to go 21 days straight without complaining, so I’ll just say….My day is GREAT!”
“Got ya,” he answered. “You don’t need to say anything else.”
So, with his help and a little self-control, I succeeded for another day.
I think. The niggling doubt crept in that I had actually complained without complaining. Some might accuse me of sabotaging my own efforts in that brand of thinking, a hidden desire to fail on this journey. But my head hurts thinking about that.
If you’re OK with it, I’m fine moving on to Day 9.
Day 9: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The young man behind the counter at the convenience store watched as I approached his station. This particular store is across the street from my gym, and I’ve fallen into the habit of stopping to get a cold drink as soon as finish working out each day. It’s that “Wow! Aren’t I proud of myself? I need a reward” mentality that gets people like me into trouble with food or shopping or other less savory addictions. Like complaining.
“How’s your day goin’?” the young man said as I handed him my loose change.
I could have told him. And a few months ago I might have “shared” the fun I had been having all day.
“I’ll answer you this way,” I said. “I’m on a quest to go 21 days straight without complaining, so I’ll just say….My day is GREAT!”
“Got ya,” he answered. “You don’t need to say anything else.”
So, with his help and a little self-control, I succeeded for another day.
I think. The niggling doubt crept in that I had actually complained without complaining. Some might accuse me of sabotaging my own efforts in that brand of thinking, a hidden desire to fail on this journey. But my head hurts thinking about that.
If you’re OK with it, I’m fine moving on to Day 9.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Day 64
Day 64: Real Time
Day 8: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I’m sorting through drawers and cupboards, moving things here and there and realizing yet again why I haven’t moved in over 20 years.
Stuff. Lots of stuff.
We all have mounds of it. So much so that entire industries exist to help us manage it.Box companies, truck rentals, storage spaces. Put it in a box so it’s out of our way, load it in the truck, and then slide it into a climate-controlled 10 x 10 with a hefty rental fee every month.
Why don’t we just toss all this detritus of modern life?
We hang on to those things that create a sense of security in a world that is increasingly unsure and hostile. It’s more comfortable to store it than let it go. We MIGHT need that crusty old hot glue gun someday, right?
Much like our reliance on grouching our way through the day. Complaining becomes a wall that protects us from getting too close and keeps folks a safe distance from our hearts where they can’t hurt us. We whine and complain and people back up in discomfort from listening to us. Mission accomplished.
I succeeded yesterday in taking some of those boxes to the trash. I carried them to the curb where they wait for the garbage truck to carry them away for good. I won’t be carting that glue gun around with me any longer.
One of those cartons was filled with dozens of complaints I could have “shared” with others as the day went on. But I didn’t. I engaged in more honest communication, even if it was uncomfortable. It was authentic. And it allowed people to get a glimpse of me.
Bring on Day 8!
Day 8: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I’m sorting through drawers and cupboards, moving things here and there and realizing yet again why I haven’t moved in over 20 years.
Stuff. Lots of stuff.
We all have mounds of it. So much so that entire industries exist to help us manage it.Box companies, truck rentals, storage spaces. Put it in a box so it’s out of our way, load it in the truck, and then slide it into a climate-controlled 10 x 10 with a hefty rental fee every month.
Why don’t we just toss all this detritus of modern life?
We hang on to those things that create a sense of security in a world that is increasingly unsure and hostile. It’s more comfortable to store it than let it go. We MIGHT need that crusty old hot glue gun someday, right?
Much like our reliance on grouching our way through the day. Complaining becomes a wall that protects us from getting too close and keeps folks a safe distance from our hearts where they can’t hurt us. We whine and complain and people back up in discomfort from listening to us. Mission accomplished.
I succeeded yesterday in taking some of those boxes to the trash. I carried them to the curb where they wait for the garbage truck to carry them away for good. I won’t be carting that glue gun around with me any longer.
One of those cartons was filled with dozens of complaints I could have “shared” with others as the day went on. But I didn’t. I engaged in more honest communication, even if it was uncomfortable. It was authentic. And it allowed people to get a glimpse of me.
Bring on Day 8!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Day 63
Day 63: Real Time
Day 7: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Sizzling Summer Sundays.
We often have good intentions for them, ideas that stretch from completing projects left over from the week to spending the day reconnecting with ourselves amid our overly-busy lives.
Mine started out one way and took a sharp left turn about 2 PM when I decided I wanted to hear the Reggae band that plays on the deck overlooking the creek near my house. I had heard them from the county dock a few months ago, but alcohol isn’t allowed in parks. I was forced to get a bit closer.
The “band” turned out to be a young man with a guitar, dreadlocks, and a great voice. The crowd gathered over the hour or so I sat there with my beer and wings, until he was joined by a saxophone player and things got a bit louder.
I’m glad I went. Just like I’m glad I started on my way to being complaint free 63 days ago.
As I sat there in the shimmering heat yesterday, I engaged in one of my favorite pastimes: Observing. Writers watch people a lot. I’ve even been known to eavesdrop on a conversation or two. But as a person who had fallen into the habit of negativity, my eyes and ears were often jumping to conclusions.
Like the couple sitting closest to me yesterday. In my old mode, I might have spent my time mentally assessing and judging them. They turned out to be a lot of fun, but I wouldn’t have known that unless I had allowed myself (and them) the time to connect on a human level.
We spend too much time and energy judging each other, I think. And then we seem to rejoice in running to the nearest sympathetic ear to whisper our illuminating “observations.” Maybe, just maybe, we could give each other the benefit of the doubt and a little space without the drama.
Who have you discounted recently?
Day 7 ahead!
Day 7: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Sizzling Summer Sundays.
We often have good intentions for them, ideas that stretch from completing projects left over from the week to spending the day reconnecting with ourselves amid our overly-busy lives.
Mine started out one way and took a sharp left turn about 2 PM when I decided I wanted to hear the Reggae band that plays on the deck overlooking the creek near my house. I had heard them from the county dock a few months ago, but alcohol isn’t allowed in parks. I was forced to get a bit closer.
The “band” turned out to be a young man with a guitar, dreadlocks, and a great voice. The crowd gathered over the hour or so I sat there with my beer and wings, until he was joined by a saxophone player and things got a bit louder.
I’m glad I went. Just like I’m glad I started on my way to being complaint free 63 days ago.
As I sat there in the shimmering heat yesterday, I engaged in one of my favorite pastimes: Observing. Writers watch people a lot. I’ve even been known to eavesdrop on a conversation or two. But as a person who had fallen into the habit of negativity, my eyes and ears were often jumping to conclusions.
Like the couple sitting closest to me yesterday. In my old mode, I might have spent my time mentally assessing and judging them. They turned out to be a lot of fun, but I wouldn’t have known that unless I had allowed myself (and them) the time to connect on a human level.
We spend too much time and energy judging each other, I think. And then we seem to rejoice in running to the nearest sympathetic ear to whisper our illuminating “observations.” Maybe, just maybe, we could give each other the benefit of the doubt and a little space without the drama.
Who have you discounted recently?
Day 7 ahead!
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Day 62: Real Time
Day 6: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Day 5 was hot and sweaty.
After all, it is Florida in July and we’re moving stuff from my mother’s to mine, from mine to storage, from her’s to storage, other things out to the trash bin…you get the picture.
But just as I do every morning, I sat out on my patio before dawn and watched the sun ease up over the back fence, the dew still heavy on the grass. It’s my favorite time of the day.
I read and watch the cardinals come to the bird feeder as it gets brighter. The blue jays usually take over next, and the woodpeckers fit themselves in around the others.
Will Bowen speaks about the Law of Attraction in his book about taking the Complaint Free journey. I hadn’t read “The Secret” when it exploded on the horizon several years ago, but have now. And I find that the concept is one that I’ve adhered to for years, without knowing that it had a name.
I do believe that we attract what we put out. Which is exactly why I am on this quest to become complaint free. I think I've been a positive person for the most part over the course of my life, usually satisfied with my place in the scheme of things, not overly worried about the future, and doing work that I feel is useful and important. I've faced obstacles, some hefty ones over the years, but haven't we all? Mine are no more important or burdensome than yours.
The energy I was emitting was so negative over the past couple of years, however, that I was tired of myself. I couldn’t imagine the effect I was having on others. Well, I could and I didn’t like to think about it. And then, quite “by accident,” I stumbled on Will’s book on CD. The title intrigued me, and I listened to it as I drove to visit a friend in Orlando.
I want to attract goodness and happiness to myself, not whining and kvetching about EVERYTHING as a way of life. Negative energy feeds on itself, like a hairy, gnarled monster that lives in the darkness of the closet we hide him in. After a while, the door won’t close any longer and he starts following us around all day, dripping venom and discontent. Pretty soon, no one can compete with the TWO snarling monsters we have become. And we’re alone.
Here's to goodness and happiness again.
Day 6 will be a good one.
Day 6: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Day 5 was hot and sweaty.
After all, it is Florida in July and we’re moving stuff from my mother’s to mine, from mine to storage, from her’s to storage, other things out to the trash bin…you get the picture.
But just as I do every morning, I sat out on my patio before dawn and watched the sun ease up over the back fence, the dew still heavy on the grass. It’s my favorite time of the day.
I read and watch the cardinals come to the bird feeder as it gets brighter. The blue jays usually take over next, and the woodpeckers fit themselves in around the others.
Will Bowen speaks about the Law of Attraction in his book about taking the Complaint Free journey. I hadn’t read “The Secret” when it exploded on the horizon several years ago, but have now. And I find that the concept is one that I’ve adhered to for years, without knowing that it had a name.
I do believe that we attract what we put out. Which is exactly why I am on this quest to become complaint free. I think I've been a positive person for the most part over the course of my life, usually satisfied with my place in the scheme of things, not overly worried about the future, and doing work that I feel is useful and important. I've faced obstacles, some hefty ones over the years, but haven't we all? Mine are no more important or burdensome than yours.
The energy I was emitting was so negative over the past couple of years, however, that I was tired of myself. I couldn’t imagine the effect I was having on others. Well, I could and I didn’t like to think about it. And then, quite “by accident,” I stumbled on Will’s book on CD. The title intrigued me, and I listened to it as I drove to visit a friend in Orlando.
I want to attract goodness and happiness to myself, not whining and kvetching about EVERYTHING as a way of life. Negative energy feeds on itself, like a hairy, gnarled monster that lives in the darkness of the closet we hide him in. After a while, the door won’t close any longer and he starts following us around all day, dripping venom and discontent. Pretty soon, no one can compete with the TWO snarling monsters we have become. And we’re alone.
Here's to goodness and happiness again.
Day 6 will be a good one.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Day 61
Day 61: Real Time
Day 5: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Working, getting carpets cleaned, shopping….busy day yesterday. And all done without complaining!
It’s hectic around here, since the decision was made for my mom to move in with me. We have to consolidate two households of furniture, three cats, and a canister set that takes up a lot of room.
Accommodating another adult in a previously “single” household is a challenge…not that I’m complaining, mind you! Whether it’s a marriage, a college dorm room, or the nest becoming full again, compromise is necessary.
Often, these are the details that derail us, aren’t they? Why can’t I bring my riding mower and store it in your backyard? It will only kill a small bit of grass back there by the fence.What’s WRONG with my pink and purple plaid shower curtain? It won’t clash too much with the blue bathroom walls.
Negotiation, mediation…all necessary to make it work. And I think it can be done without griping behind one another’s back. It’s a skill that is sorely lacking around us all the time, from the kids’ playground to the workplace. People who don’t want to face one another and work it out.
Day 5 will be busy!
Day 5: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Working, getting carpets cleaned, shopping….busy day yesterday. And all done without complaining!
It’s hectic around here, since the decision was made for my mom to move in with me. We have to consolidate two households of furniture, three cats, and a canister set that takes up a lot of room.
Accommodating another adult in a previously “single” household is a challenge…not that I’m complaining, mind you! Whether it’s a marriage, a college dorm room, or the nest becoming full again, compromise is necessary.
Often, these are the details that derail us, aren’t they? Why can’t I bring my riding mower and store it in your backyard? It will only kill a small bit of grass back there by the fence.What’s WRONG with my pink and purple plaid shower curtain? It won’t clash too much with the blue bathroom walls.
Negotiation, mediation…all necessary to make it work. And I think it can be done without griping behind one another’s back. It’s a skill that is sorely lacking around us all the time, from the kids’ playground to the workplace. People who don’t want to face one another and work it out.
Day 5 will be busy!
Friday, July 16, 2010
Day 60 (YES! 60.)
Day 60: Real Time
Day 4: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Day 3 accomplished!
In my early morning reading today, I stumbled on another way to maneuver the “complaint free” highway.
Compassion.
Compassion for those who don’t think like me. For those who trip and fall just as often as I do.
Empathy for others who lug their own burdens around all day. Even if I can’t see those burdens myself.
Mercy, grace, and charity for all who inhabit the planet, struggling to get through their days without so much of what that they need. My life is good, and I don’t think I appreciate it enough.
In other words, it’s not all about me, is it?
Day 4.
Day 4: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Day 3 accomplished!
In my early morning reading today, I stumbled on another way to maneuver the “complaint free” highway.
Compassion.
Compassion for those who don’t think like me. For those who trip and fall just as often as I do.
Empathy for others who lug their own burdens around all day. Even if I can’t see those burdens myself.
Mercy, grace, and charity for all who inhabit the planet, struggling to get through their days without so much of what that they need. My life is good, and I don’t think I appreciate it enough.
In other words, it’s not all about me, is it?
Day 4.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Day 59
Day 59: Real Time
Day 3: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
My dreaded meeting yesterday went fine. I prevailed, and did it with no complaints and (little) agitation.
Later during the day when folks who know the situation asked me how it went, I answered with a positive, “Fine,” and then moved on to other, less dangerous topics.
I guess the pre-planning helped, right?
When we talk to our children, we emphasize how important practice is to anything we want to master. Playing a flute, kicking a soccer ball, hitting a ball, doing algebra…all of it takes a great deal of practice.
I felt defeated yesterday, truly down at the mouth about this attempt to become complaint-free. And then I again listened to a tape in my head of talking to my own daughter about practice, about persistence, about keeping the goal in sight.
Therefore, I’m on to Day 3!
Day 3: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
My dreaded meeting yesterday went fine. I prevailed, and did it with no complaints and (little) agitation.
Later during the day when folks who know the situation asked me how it went, I answered with a positive, “Fine,” and then moved on to other, less dangerous topics.
I guess the pre-planning helped, right?
When we talk to our children, we emphasize how important practice is to anything we want to master. Playing a flute, kicking a soccer ball, hitting a ball, doing algebra…all of it takes a great deal of practice.
I felt defeated yesterday, truly down at the mouth about this attempt to become complaint-free. And then I again listened to a tape in my head of talking to my own daughter about practice, about persistence, about keeping the goal in sight.
Therefore, I’m on to Day 3!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Day 58
Day 58: Real Time
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Today may be my biggest challenge yet. Remember the person who tipped me over into Day 1 again the other day?
I have a meeting with that same person this morning. Different topic, but I know the one we discussed the other day will come up. That’s part of this person’s “charm.”
Visualization has worked for me over the years, in many different contexts. When I don’t want to do something, like wash the car or weed the garden, I find all kinds of reasons why I can’t do it right then. But if I picture myself doing it, visualize the action itself with no words involved, the task somehow becomes more accessible to me.
Today, I am visualizing my meeting. I see myself taking a place at the table and hear the previous offending topic come up as we gather.
I can feel my emotions starting to simmer already. So, maybe…just maybe…I can control my reactions in a few hours when I am in the situation. And, more importantly, maybe I can exert that control once the meeting is over and I find someone (and there are many) who is more than willing to commiserate with me.
So a plan is needed to control my reactions and my desire to “share” the meeting with others later. I must find other ways to bleed off my negative energy, ways that might actually be productive, both in the moment and later in the day.
I had a successful day yesterday, which was another Day 1. I am beginning to wonder if everyone who attempts their 21 days finds this so difficult. I have begun to doubt whether I can actually do this.
Day 2. I’ll let you know tomorrow how it goes.
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Today may be my biggest challenge yet. Remember the person who tipped me over into Day 1 again the other day?
I have a meeting with that same person this morning. Different topic, but I know the one we discussed the other day will come up. That’s part of this person’s “charm.”
Visualization has worked for me over the years, in many different contexts. When I don’t want to do something, like wash the car or weed the garden, I find all kinds of reasons why I can’t do it right then. But if I picture myself doing it, visualize the action itself with no words involved, the task somehow becomes more accessible to me.
Today, I am visualizing my meeting. I see myself taking a place at the table and hear the previous offending topic come up as we gather.
I can feel my emotions starting to simmer already. So, maybe…just maybe…I can control my reactions in a few hours when I am in the situation. And, more importantly, maybe I can exert that control once the meeting is over and I find someone (and there are many) who is more than willing to commiserate with me.
So a plan is needed to control my reactions and my desire to “share” the meeting with others later. I must find other ways to bleed off my negative energy, ways that might actually be productive, both in the moment and later in the day.
I had a successful day yesterday, which was another Day 1. I am beginning to wonder if everyone who attempts their 21 days finds this so difficult. I have begun to doubt whether I can actually do this.
Day 2. I’ll let you know tomorrow how it goes.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Day 57
Day 57: Real Time
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
To say I was angry would be an understatement. I was furious.
Irritated with incompetence, one of those items on my “DANGER” list? Oh, you can’t even begin to know.
Frustrated? Doesn’t even come close to describing what drove me over the edge yesterday.
Again.
But, this time I fell into the complaint-filled muck by choice. Yes, I did it intentionally and with forethought. I just had to. Or at least I thought I did at the time, but I’ll come back to that in a minute.
I was alone as I carried on an infuriating phone conversation with someone who has this effect on me about three times a year. You’d think I would be used to it, but as I’ve told you before, incompetence is one of those traits that sends my blood pressure into the red zone faster than just about anything.
After I hung up, I was seething. And I even thought about how I was going to calm myself without complaining. Without “sharing.”
I did some deep breathing.
I thought about something pleasant.
I had a glass of cold iced tea when I got home a few minutes later.
I changed my clothes and got comfy to work the rest of the day at my desk.
I considered how I could get past the negative emotion without dumping on someone else.
And when the opportunity arose about 30 minutes later, I fell anyway.
“I’m going to complain,” I said. “I HAVE to complain.”
And I did.
Did it make me feel better? For a few minutes, I must admit. But the anger feeds on itself, especially when you have a willing audience. They want to hop right on that train of righteousness with you, pulling the whistle loud and long.
I think that’s the point of controlling our complaining. My rant didn’t fix anything. It did lessen my psychic burden for a brief time. But my inner terrain was no better in the long run and it spread the negativity from me to someone else. I still have to deal with this situation and the person who caused it. I didn’t learn how to do that more successfully from my “sharing.”
Choices. We always have choices. And we must face the backflow of those choices.
Back to Day 1.
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
To say I was angry would be an understatement. I was furious.
Irritated with incompetence, one of those items on my “DANGER” list? Oh, you can’t even begin to know.
Frustrated? Doesn’t even come close to describing what drove me over the edge yesterday.
Again.
But, this time I fell into the complaint-filled muck by choice. Yes, I did it intentionally and with forethought. I just had to. Or at least I thought I did at the time, but I’ll come back to that in a minute.
I was alone as I carried on an infuriating phone conversation with someone who has this effect on me about three times a year. You’d think I would be used to it, but as I’ve told you before, incompetence is one of those traits that sends my blood pressure into the red zone faster than just about anything.
After I hung up, I was seething. And I even thought about how I was going to calm myself without complaining. Without “sharing.”
I did some deep breathing.
I thought about something pleasant.
I had a glass of cold iced tea when I got home a few minutes later.
I changed my clothes and got comfy to work the rest of the day at my desk.
I considered how I could get past the negative emotion without dumping on someone else.
And when the opportunity arose about 30 minutes later, I fell anyway.
“I’m going to complain,” I said. “I HAVE to complain.”
And I did.
Did it make me feel better? For a few minutes, I must admit. But the anger feeds on itself, especially when you have a willing audience. They want to hop right on that train of righteousness with you, pulling the whistle loud and long.
I think that’s the point of controlling our complaining. My rant didn’t fix anything. It did lessen my psychic burden for a brief time. But my inner terrain was no better in the long run and it spread the negativity from me to someone else. I still have to deal with this situation and the person who caused it. I didn’t learn how to do that more successfully from my “sharing.”
Choices. We always have choices. And we must face the backflow of those choices.
Back to Day 1.
Monday, July 12, 2010
Day 56
Day 56: Real Time
Day 5: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I’ve thought a lot about why complaining has become the mode of conversation for so many of us. Somewhere I bet a think tank is even spending millions of dollars examining the issue.
I think it’s pretty simple, though.
At one time we lived in a society that worked more than it didn’t.
Phone calls to our service providers were answered by humans who could interact with us and our questions. And they often even cared about helping us. Our elected officials acted….well, official, instead of officious. Our doctors knew us and our histories. They took the time to listen, and then they prescribed medication or tests that actually helped us instead of making it worse and costing us the mortgage.
In other words, we trusted one another.
When that trust disappeared, the complaining became rampant. And seemingly with good cause.
Remember, complaining is allowed when it’s to someone who can correct an issue and when it remains focused on the problem. It becomes counterproductive when we cross the line into a personal attack….and we all know exactly when in the conversation that happens, don’t we? We can feel the negativity darken our spirits.
The question is whether the type of complaining most of us engage in has helped restore that trust. Or are we reacting to a society whose wheels have fallen off, tossing us into the dirt? And then we just can’t wait to tell our friends, relatives, and strangers in line at the grocery store what happened, can we?
The cycle of distrust creaks on.
It may make us feel better in that moment, but that type of complaining has only gotten us here: A society that is reactive and feeding on the emotion of those reactions. We’re not fixing anything any more than the robots on the other end of the phone line.
Day 5 stretches ahead. A back to work day, full of interactions with coworkers and peers.
I just hope my computer service stays on line and my phone doesn’t break.
Day 5: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I’ve thought a lot about why complaining has become the mode of conversation for so many of us. Somewhere I bet a think tank is even spending millions of dollars examining the issue.
I think it’s pretty simple, though.
At one time we lived in a society that worked more than it didn’t.
Phone calls to our service providers were answered by humans who could interact with us and our questions. And they often even cared about helping us. Our elected officials acted….well, official, instead of officious. Our doctors knew us and our histories. They took the time to listen, and then they prescribed medication or tests that actually helped us instead of making it worse and costing us the mortgage.
In other words, we trusted one another.
When that trust disappeared, the complaining became rampant. And seemingly with good cause.
Remember, complaining is allowed when it’s to someone who can correct an issue and when it remains focused on the problem. It becomes counterproductive when we cross the line into a personal attack….and we all know exactly when in the conversation that happens, don’t we? We can feel the negativity darken our spirits.
The question is whether the type of complaining most of us engage in has helped restore that trust. Or are we reacting to a society whose wheels have fallen off, tossing us into the dirt? And then we just can’t wait to tell our friends, relatives, and strangers in line at the grocery store what happened, can we?
The cycle of distrust creaks on.
It may make us feel better in that moment, but that type of complaining has only gotten us here: A society that is reactive and feeding on the emotion of those reactions. We’re not fixing anything any more than the robots on the other end of the phone line.
Day 5 stretches ahead. A back to work day, full of interactions with coworkers and peers.
I just hope my computer service stays on line and my phone doesn’t break.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Day 55
Day 55: Real Time
Day 4: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Rollin’ along here….
Day 3 went well. I attempted to keep my goal in front of me a bit more than I have before.
Maybe I’m becoming more aware of those “STOP! DANGER AHEAD!” signs before I blow past them and then wonder what the heck happened.
My mother is moving in with me. Since my father’s death six weeks ago today, we’ve dealt with the grief, of course, but also the more tangible issues of money and insurance and residences. All topics that could destroy my goal of becoming complaint free, wouldn’t you agree?
I started this journey, as some of you may remember, at about the time that my dad’s health took a dramatic nose-dive. I didn’t plan it that way, but that’s how life is. Our biggest challenges come when we’re not paying close attention, when we’re thinking everything is finally smoothing out and things are flowing along fine.
Yesterday we moved some boxes into storage in 95°heat. We fought the crowds at Wal-Mart on a Saturday to buy more tape and groceries, cat litter (for three cats now instead of my two) and kibble, shampoo and toothpaste. I took pictures and uploaded them for the “Furniture for sale” ad we put in the paper. My car decided it needed its coolant replaced. I went home and collapsed. Wine came soon after.
But I didn’t complain. Not once.
Do I sound rather pleased with myself? You bet.
If you’d like a bracelet of your own, I can tell you where to get one.
Day 4.
Day 4: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Rollin’ along here….
Day 3 went well. I attempted to keep my goal in front of me a bit more than I have before.
Maybe I’m becoming more aware of those “STOP! DANGER AHEAD!” signs before I blow past them and then wonder what the heck happened.
My mother is moving in with me. Since my father’s death six weeks ago today, we’ve dealt with the grief, of course, but also the more tangible issues of money and insurance and residences. All topics that could destroy my goal of becoming complaint free, wouldn’t you agree?
I started this journey, as some of you may remember, at about the time that my dad’s health took a dramatic nose-dive. I didn’t plan it that way, but that’s how life is. Our biggest challenges come when we’re not paying close attention, when we’re thinking everything is finally smoothing out and things are flowing along fine.
Yesterday we moved some boxes into storage in 95°heat. We fought the crowds at Wal-Mart on a Saturday to buy more tape and groceries, cat litter (for three cats now instead of my two) and kibble, shampoo and toothpaste. I took pictures and uploaded them for the “Furniture for sale” ad we put in the paper. My car decided it needed its coolant replaced. I went home and collapsed. Wine came soon after.
But I didn’t complain. Not once.
Do I sound rather pleased with myself? You bet.
If you’d like a bracelet of your own, I can tell you where to get one.
Day 4.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Day 54
Day 54: Real Time
Day 3: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Remember the list I shared with you earlier this week? The topics that continue to get me in trouble?
It happened again. The third topic, incompetence, raised its snarling head during a conversation about getting a question answered by some folks at Social Security.
You’re thinking I blew it and have to go back to Day 1, aren’t you. This time, you would be wrong.
My heart rate went up, my breathing started to quicken….and then I stopped myself before my body took over the controls for my mouth.
I took a deep breath (a VERY deep one, I have to say) and then I said, “Well, let’s move on from that.”
A friend sent me the following this morning.
TWO WOLVES
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.
"One is Evil - It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
"The other is Good - It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
I chose to feed the second wolf when I made the conscious decision to move on from a topic that I know only leads me to anger and resentment.
Day 3.
Day 3: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Remember the list I shared with you earlier this week? The topics that continue to get me in trouble?
It happened again. The third topic, incompetence, raised its snarling head during a conversation about getting a question answered by some folks at Social Security.
You’re thinking I blew it and have to go back to Day 1, aren’t you. This time, you would be wrong.
My heart rate went up, my breathing started to quicken….and then I stopped myself before my body took over the controls for my mouth.
I took a deep breath (a VERY deep one, I have to say) and then I said, “Well, let’s move on from that.”
A friend sent me the following this morning.
TWO WOLVES
One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people.
He said, "My son, the battle is between two wolves inside us all.
"One is Evil - It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
"The other is Good - It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"
The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."
I chose to feed the second wolf when I made the conscious decision to move on from a topic that I know only leads me to anger and resentment.
Day 3.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Day 53
Day 53: Real Time
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Oh, the summer night
Has a smile of light
And she sits on a sapphire throne. Barry Cornwall
Summer is my favorite time of the year. The heat shimmers, butterflies float gently among the flowers in my garden, and I spend a lot of time watching white pillow clouds skim across the sapphire sky above my folding chair.
I had a good day yesterday. A few temptations to turn from positive to negative, but I fought them off successfully. After my nonsensical tumble from the wagon the day before, I talked to myself a lot as the hours ticked by, pointed conversations about having the fortitude to complete the 21 day challenge….or not.
I’ve faced so many obstacles in my life…..we all have….that I find it amazing that this is proving to be as difficult as it is.
But, it’s summer, I have enough work to pay the bills, my daughter is healthy and happy (and also working!). So, I am going to concentrate on the positive things in my life.
Here’s to Complaint-Free Day 2.
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Oh, the summer night
Has a smile of light
And she sits on a sapphire throne. Barry Cornwall
Summer is my favorite time of the year. The heat shimmers, butterflies float gently among the flowers in my garden, and I spend a lot of time watching white pillow clouds skim across the sapphire sky above my folding chair.
I had a good day yesterday. A few temptations to turn from positive to negative, but I fought them off successfully. After my nonsensical tumble from the wagon the day before, I talked to myself a lot as the hours ticked by, pointed conversations about having the fortitude to complete the 21 day challenge….or not.
I’ve faced so many obstacles in my life…..we all have….that I find it amazing that this is proving to be as difficult as it is.
But, it’s summer, I have enough work to pay the bills, my daughter is healthy and happy (and also working!). So, I am going to concentrate on the positive things in my life.
Here’s to Complaint-Free Day 2.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Day 52
Day 52: Real Time
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Acceptance.
Acceptance.
Acceptance.
Maybe if I say it enough times I’ll begin to practice it.
Holding a mirror up to merely reflect what is happening around me. Instead of judging what is happening. And then complaining about it.
My aspiration is to observe and reflect the actions, speech, attitudes of others, without carrying the baggage of the past or the taint of my own prejudices into the room.
Maybe someday I’ll reach that goal. I am making some small strides toward it, like yesterday morning when the first topic on yesterday’s list came up again. I started to exhibit extreme non-acceptance, but jerked myself back at the last moment.
“I’m sorry that happened,” I said instead. “I’m glad no one was hurt.” (You’d have to be there, but the details are not important here.)
I was seething inside, though. I REALLY wanted to launch.
Baby steps.
The rest of the day was good, too. Acceptance reigned, I was calm and reflective, no complaints, even as I met a friend for dinner and we talked. Usually dangerous territory for me.
Then I blew it over something trivial and totally unimportant. I didn’t “reflect,” that’s for sure. I took that mirror and stuck my whole head through it.
And, to make it even worse, I posted it on a social networking site for everyone to see.
Acceptance….even for myself and my failings.
Day 1.
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
Acceptance.
Acceptance.
Acceptance.
Maybe if I say it enough times I’ll begin to practice it.
Holding a mirror up to merely reflect what is happening around me. Instead of judging what is happening. And then complaining about it.
My aspiration is to observe and reflect the actions, speech, attitudes of others, without carrying the baggage of the past or the taint of my own prejudices into the room.
Maybe someday I’ll reach that goal. I am making some small strides toward it, like yesterday morning when the first topic on yesterday’s list came up again. I started to exhibit extreme non-acceptance, but jerked myself back at the last moment.
“I’m sorry that happened,” I said instead. “I’m glad no one was hurt.” (You’d have to be there, but the details are not important here.)
I was seething inside, though. I REALLY wanted to launch.
Baby steps.
The rest of the day was good, too. Acceptance reigned, I was calm and reflective, no complaints, even as I met a friend for dinner and we talked. Usually dangerous territory for me.
Then I blew it over something trivial and totally unimportant. I didn’t “reflect,” that’s for sure. I took that mirror and stuck my whole head through it.
And, to make it even worse, I posted it on a social networking site for everyone to see.
Acceptance….even for myself and my failings.
Day 1.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Day 51
Day 51: Real Time
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The topics that defeat me are always the same. I’ve noted that here before, but I keep succumbing to them anyway.
Let me be a bit more specific. Maybe that will help.
Our city government.
The educational system, both locally and nationally.
Incompetence in general.
Parents who don’t parent.
These are the topics that loom before me on this path, like iron-enforced walls full of jagged nails, ready to impale me when I get too close.
And yesterday I found myself facing the first one on the list again. I threw myself against the nails on its wall, and in that moment, gave no thought to the damage I was about to do.
I stumbled back, took a breath, and realized what I had done. Again. The figurative blood dripped down my chest, soiling my good intentions to be complaint free. What would have been my Day 6.
I moved my bracelet and literally hung my head as I did it.
These topics are close to my heart. Therefore, my heart is in danger when they are in the vicinity. I have done what I can to affect the outcomes of all of them, and have turned those gauntlets over to younger, more resilient folks. However, they still have the power to enrage me. I just can’t seem to shake them.
Maybe I should engrave their names on a silver wrist bracelet as a more tangible reminder: DANGER! STAND BACK! DON’T ENGAGE!
I will not be defeated in the long run, though. I just won’t.
Day 1.
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The topics that defeat me are always the same. I’ve noted that here before, but I keep succumbing to them anyway.
Let me be a bit more specific. Maybe that will help.
Our city government.
The educational system, both locally and nationally.
Incompetence in general.
Parents who don’t parent.
These are the topics that loom before me on this path, like iron-enforced walls full of jagged nails, ready to impale me when I get too close.
And yesterday I found myself facing the first one on the list again. I threw myself against the nails on its wall, and in that moment, gave no thought to the damage I was about to do.
I stumbled back, took a breath, and realized what I had done. Again. The figurative blood dripped down my chest, soiling my good intentions to be complaint free. What would have been my Day 6.
I moved my bracelet and literally hung my head as I did it.
These topics are close to my heart. Therefore, my heart is in danger when they are in the vicinity. I have done what I can to affect the outcomes of all of them, and have turned those gauntlets over to younger, more resilient folks. However, they still have the power to enrage me. I just can’t seem to shake them.
Maybe I should engrave their names on a silver wrist bracelet as a more tangible reminder: DANGER! STAND BACK! DON’T ENGAGE!
I will not be defeated in the long run, though. I just won’t.
Day 1.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Day 50
Day 50: Real Time
Day 5: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I’ve had friends in the past who were chronic complainers. They didn’t even know they did it. We would meet for a meal and the litany would begin, usually the same one over and over, whatever or whoever the constant yoke around their neck. We could have taped the previous meeting and just hit “play” and saved us both a lot of time. Except our spirits would still be crushed for the rest of the day either way.
It is so wearing, isn’t it?
I don’t want to be that person. The one with friends who get back in their cars, exhausted and drained from simply sharing time with me. The one people start avoiding on the phone, deleting my emails unread, and slowly easing me from their lives when they just couldn't listen to it one more time.
I’m on my 5th day of the path to being complaint free. The path that leads to joyous conversations about the beauty inherent in our lives each day, if we only allow ourselves time to see it.
Another way of looking at it, too, is that I have been aware of the alternate path for 50 days. Sometimes the saddest wrong turns happen when we didn’t even see another trail stretching ahead, one that could have led us to fantastic, wondrous destinations.
Day 5: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I’ve had friends in the past who were chronic complainers. They didn’t even know they did it. We would meet for a meal and the litany would begin, usually the same one over and over, whatever or whoever the constant yoke around their neck. We could have taped the previous meeting and just hit “play” and saved us both a lot of time. Except our spirits would still be crushed for the rest of the day either way.
It is so wearing, isn’t it?
I don’t want to be that person. The one with friends who get back in their cars, exhausted and drained from simply sharing time with me. The one people start avoiding on the phone, deleting my emails unread, and slowly easing me from their lives when they just couldn't listen to it one more time.
I’m on my 5th day of the path to being complaint free. The path that leads to joyous conversations about the beauty inherent in our lives each day, if we only allow ourselves time to see it.
Another way of looking at it, too, is that I have been aware of the alternate path for 50 days. Sometimes the saddest wrong turns happen when we didn’t even see another trail stretching ahead, one that could have led us to fantastic, wondrous destinations.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Day 49
Day 49:Real Time
Day 4: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
As I’ve moved down the path of attempting to become complaint-free, I have encountered many people who adamantly contend that complaining is a motivating force for the better.
“It’s how things get changed!” they proclaim.
“How else does injustice get fixed?” they ask.
“We NEED to vent,” they say. “It’s healthy.”
I think what these people really mean is, “Let me get on with my complaining! I kind of like it and I want you to like it, too, if only to make me feel better as I whine.”
As I sat in the formal gardens of our local art museum last night and listened to a band play in celebration of our Independence Day, I took myself back to the days of the Revolutionary War. A clandestine meeting is being held in the home of a couple who support the movement to separate from England, a truly revolutionary stance. Those attending the meeting had to “cover” their meeting as if it was a social tea party, friends gathering in the dusk of a spring evening to exchange pleasantries. To do otherwise could lead to charges of treason, a truly frightening prospect for these mothers and fathers, family folks with children and lives to protect.
They persistently recorded their stance and sent it sailing across the Atlantic to their King, complete with an outline of what they wanted and how they wanted to be treated as English citizens living thousands of miles away from their country. The King was the person who could change their plight. He refused to listen.
Then they dumped tea in Boston Harbor. They engaged in non-compliance with the King’s edicts. They laid plans. They discussed strategy. They assigned tasks to further the cause. Then they each went home to quiver in the candlelight, wondering if they had the fortitude to take this perilous path.
Can you picture what would have happened if they had just rehashed and revisited the same complaints against their Mother Country and its leadership? No plans, no resolution, no end in sight. Do you think they continued to spend this valuable, dangerous time together grousing about the King and his cluelessness, merely wringing their collective hands and whining as they drank their tea?
Interesting to contemplate where we all might be today if they had taken that path of moaning and groaning. After all, it probably made them feel better to get it off their chests, right? I wonder how it would have translated for us in the 21st century.
Complaining does have value and is “allowed” IF it is directed to those who can change the situation. And IF it is topic-focused, without turning to personal attacks that are no longer about that topic.
I think about those revolutionaries, those ordinary people who were willing to sacrifice everything for what they thought was right. They were willing to be labeled “traitors,” even though they were merely demanding to be treated properly as British subjects.
They could have lost it all. But they had a plan and they executed it after letting the King know exactly what they had in mind.
Day 4 lies ahead for me. If they were able to handle it, so can I.
Day 4: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
As I’ve moved down the path of attempting to become complaint-free, I have encountered many people who adamantly contend that complaining is a motivating force for the better.
“It’s how things get changed!” they proclaim.
“How else does injustice get fixed?” they ask.
“We NEED to vent,” they say. “It’s healthy.”
I think what these people really mean is, “Let me get on with my complaining! I kind of like it and I want you to like it, too, if only to make me feel better as I whine.”
As I sat in the formal gardens of our local art museum last night and listened to a band play in celebration of our Independence Day, I took myself back to the days of the Revolutionary War. A clandestine meeting is being held in the home of a couple who support the movement to separate from England, a truly revolutionary stance. Those attending the meeting had to “cover” their meeting as if it was a social tea party, friends gathering in the dusk of a spring evening to exchange pleasantries. To do otherwise could lead to charges of treason, a truly frightening prospect for these mothers and fathers, family folks with children and lives to protect.
They persistently recorded their stance and sent it sailing across the Atlantic to their King, complete with an outline of what they wanted and how they wanted to be treated as English citizens living thousands of miles away from their country. The King was the person who could change their plight. He refused to listen.
Then they dumped tea in Boston Harbor. They engaged in non-compliance with the King’s edicts. They laid plans. They discussed strategy. They assigned tasks to further the cause. Then they each went home to quiver in the candlelight, wondering if they had the fortitude to take this perilous path.
Can you picture what would have happened if they had just rehashed and revisited the same complaints against their Mother Country and its leadership? No plans, no resolution, no end in sight. Do you think they continued to spend this valuable, dangerous time together grousing about the King and his cluelessness, merely wringing their collective hands and whining as they drank their tea?
Interesting to contemplate where we all might be today if they had taken that path of moaning and groaning. After all, it probably made them feel better to get it off their chests, right? I wonder how it would have translated for us in the 21st century.
Complaining does have value and is “allowed” IF it is directed to those who can change the situation. And IF it is topic-focused, without turning to personal attacks that are no longer about that topic.
I think about those revolutionaries, those ordinary people who were willing to sacrifice everything for what they thought was right. They were willing to be labeled “traitors,” even though they were merely demanding to be treated properly as British subjects.
They could have lost it all. But they had a plan and they executed it after letting the King know exactly what they had in mind.
Day 4 lies ahead for me. If they were able to handle it, so can I.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Day 48
Day 48: Real Time
Day 3: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
“The way out of our cage begins with accepting absolutely everything about ourselves and our lives, by embracing ourselves and our lives, by embracing with wakefulness and care our moment-to-moment experience. …..what I mean is that we are aware of what is happening within our body and mind in any given moment, without trying to judge or pull away. This is an inner process of accepting our actual present-moment experience.” Tara Brach, as quoted in 365 Nirvana: Here and Now.
Interesting analogy, isn’t it? “Our cage” of complaining, which is our unacceptance of what is happening to us at any particular moment.
Much like Will Bowen explains in his book, “A Complaint Free World,” accepting the present moment does NOT mean we don’t take action when our lives are headed in the wrong direction. It does NOT mean accepting shoddy service or allowing others to take advantage of us.
It does have a lot to do with avoiding judging our moments, I think. If we encounter an injustice or see an adjustment we need to make, we simply do it with grace and dignity in order to better our own lives. We do it with assertiveness, but without acrimony and aggressiveness.
I made it through another complaint-free day by staying present, even as I dealt with the last bit of business with the company that didn’t work out for me. That weight has been lifted from my shoulders, and I managed it without again being offended by the details that led to the end of that relationship.
In other words, the cage door didn't slam shut on me, trapping me inside again.
Day 3: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
“The way out of our cage begins with accepting absolutely everything about ourselves and our lives, by embracing ourselves and our lives, by embracing with wakefulness and care our moment-to-moment experience. …..what I mean is that we are aware of what is happening within our body and mind in any given moment, without trying to judge or pull away. This is an inner process of accepting our actual present-moment experience.” Tara Brach, as quoted in 365 Nirvana: Here and Now.
Interesting analogy, isn’t it? “Our cage” of complaining, which is our unacceptance of what is happening to us at any particular moment.
Much like Will Bowen explains in his book, “A Complaint Free World,” accepting the present moment does NOT mean we don’t take action when our lives are headed in the wrong direction. It does NOT mean accepting shoddy service or allowing others to take advantage of us.
It does have a lot to do with avoiding judging our moments, I think. If we encounter an injustice or see an adjustment we need to make, we simply do it with grace and dignity in order to better our own lives. We do it with assertiveness, but without acrimony and aggressiveness.
I made it through another complaint-free day by staying present, even as I dealt with the last bit of business with the company that didn’t work out for me. That weight has been lifted from my shoulders, and I managed it without again being offended by the details that led to the end of that relationship.
In other words, the cage door didn't slam shut on me, trapping me inside again.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Day 47
Day 47: Real Time
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I walked my road without complaining yesterday. Just for the day.
And I made it successfully to the next junction…..which is today.
I had a morning conversation at my office with someone I respect and admire a great deal, a person I’ve known a long time in several capacities. We were catching each other up on our schedules and lives in general, the kind of interaction so many of us have as we settle in at work.
And I almost fell off the cliff again into the cesspool of negative conversation. BUT….I pulled myself back from the edge just in time. I actually saw myself do it, the visual image was that strong.
I kept that mental picture close to me all day as a reminder when I was tempted to begin the loop of complaining that has become so familiar and, unfortunately, so comfortable for me in recent months. Whatever it was, it worked.
Day 2 stretches in front of me with much to do, the beginning of a holiday weekend.
Only 24 hours to maneuver, complaint-free.
Day 2: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
I walked my road without complaining yesterday. Just for the day.
And I made it successfully to the next junction…..which is today.
I had a morning conversation at my office with someone I respect and admire a great deal, a person I’ve known a long time in several capacities. We were catching each other up on our schedules and lives in general, the kind of interaction so many of us have as we settle in at work.
And I almost fell off the cliff again into the cesspool of negative conversation. BUT….I pulled myself back from the edge just in time. I actually saw myself do it, the visual image was that strong.
I kept that mental picture close to me all day as a reminder when I was tempted to begin the loop of complaining that has become so familiar and, unfortunately, so comfortable for me in recent months. Whatever it was, it worked.
Day 2 stretches in front of me with much to do, the beginning of a holiday weekend.
Only 24 hours to maneuver, complaint-free.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Day 46
Day 46: Real Time
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Challenge
Day one….again.
Day ONE….AGAIN??
Day one. Again.
I got involved in a conversation with a co-worker yesterday, a person I hadn’t seen for a week or so.
Enough said.
Day one…..yes, again.
Later in the afternoon I had lunch with my daughter and a friend of hers. Both are members of the 21-day complaint free challenge club, so the topic just happened to come up as we ate our hot wings. Go figure.
“But you made it 8 days,” the friend said. And she said it with enthusiasm about that accomplishment, because she now knows how hard this journey is, too.
As I thought about her comment later, I realized that I hadn’t been thinking of it that way. It’s strange how we can encourage others to “enjoy the journey,” or “take one step at a time,” and yet completely miss the message ourselves, isn’t it?
This isn’t a 21-day challenge, any more than my recent weight loss is “done.” It will be a life-long effort, with successes and setbacks along the way. One day at a time.
But it will be a road that I have to continue to walk every day, brick by brick, hour by hour.
Today I’ll just concentrate on today. Not the next 20 days. Or the rest of my life.
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Challenge
Day one….again.
Day ONE….AGAIN??
Day one. Again.
I got involved in a conversation with a co-worker yesterday, a person I hadn’t seen for a week or so.
Enough said.
Day one…..yes, again.
Later in the afternoon I had lunch with my daughter and a friend of hers. Both are members of the 21-day complaint free challenge club, so the topic just happened to come up as we ate our hot wings. Go figure.
“But you made it 8 days,” the friend said. And she said it with enthusiasm about that accomplishment, because she now knows how hard this journey is, too.
As I thought about her comment later, I realized that I hadn’t been thinking of it that way. It’s strange how we can encourage others to “enjoy the journey,” or “take one step at a time,” and yet completely miss the message ourselves, isn’t it?
This isn’t a 21-day challenge, any more than my recent weight loss is “done.” It will be a life-long effort, with successes and setbacks along the way. One day at a time.
But it will be a road that I have to continue to walk every day, brick by brick, hour by hour.
Today I’ll just concentrate on today. Not the next 20 days. Or the rest of my life.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Day 45: Real Time
Day 9: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The presence of 24 hour media coverage has resulted in much of the drama we see around us today, both in the news as well as in our personal lives. We are aware of it, we might get tired of it, but we still pay attention to it, don’t we?
What celebrities are cheating on one another, who is suing whom, what athlete is running over mailboxes in the wee hours of the morning….we sit glued to our televisions or computer screens as the update of the minute is reported.
But what happens when a media outlet tries to buck the trend and report good news? Do we read that in equal intensity as all the drama with negative overtones?
I think you know that answer to that question. We don’t. We just don’t.
As I go through my first complete week of being complaint free, I find that I have less to write about. It just doesn’t seem as interesting when I do well. There aren’t any heart wrenching stories to relate about how I fell off the wagon, so you probably won’t read to the end of my entry when I’ve had a successful day.
Sad, but I do think it’s true.
My life has quieted, and it’s a welcome respite. I hope you come along with me, though, rain or shine.
NEWS FLASH! BREAKING HEADLINES! DAY 9 IS UP TO BAT…STAY TUNED FOR CONTINUOUS CONVERAGE!
Day 9: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey
The presence of 24 hour media coverage has resulted in much of the drama we see around us today, both in the news as well as in our personal lives. We are aware of it, we might get tired of it, but we still pay attention to it, don’t we?
What celebrities are cheating on one another, who is suing whom, what athlete is running over mailboxes in the wee hours of the morning….we sit glued to our televisions or computer screens as the update of the minute is reported.
But what happens when a media outlet tries to buck the trend and report good news? Do we read that in equal intensity as all the drama with negative overtones?
I think you know that answer to that question. We don’t. We just don’t.
As I go through my first complete week of being complaint free, I find that I have less to write about. It just doesn’t seem as interesting when I do well. There aren’t any heart wrenching stories to relate about how I fell off the wagon, so you probably won’t read to the end of my entry when I’ve had a successful day.
Sad, but I do think it’s true.
My life has quieted, and it’s a welcome respite. I hope you come along with me, though, rain or shine.
NEWS FLASH! BREAKING HEADLINES! DAY 9 IS UP TO BAT…STAY TUNED FOR CONTINUOUS CONVERAGE!
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