Day 57

Day 57: Real Time
Day 1: 21 Day Complaint Free Journey

To say I was angry would be an understatement. I was furious.

Irritated with incompetence, one of those items on my “DANGER” list? Oh, you can’t even begin to know.

Frustrated? Doesn’t even come close to describing what drove me over the edge yesterday.

Again.

But, this time I fell into the complaint-filled muck by choice. Yes, I did it intentionally and with forethought. I just had to. Or at least I thought I did at the time, but I’ll come back to that in a minute.

I was alone as I carried on an infuriating phone conversation with someone who has this effect on me about three times a year. You’d think I would be used to it, but as I’ve told you before, incompetence is one of those traits that sends my blood pressure into the red zone faster than just about anything.

After I hung up, I was seething. And I even thought about how I was going to calm myself without complaining. Without “sharing.”

I did some deep breathing.

I thought about something pleasant.

I had a glass of cold iced tea when I got home a few minutes later.

I changed my clothes and got comfy to work the rest of the day at my desk.

I considered how I could get past the negative emotion without dumping on someone else.

And when the opportunity arose about 30 minutes later, I fell anyway.

“I’m going to complain,” I said. “I HAVE to complain.”
And I did.

Did it make me feel better? For a few minutes, I must admit. But the anger feeds on itself, especially when you have a willing audience. They want to hop right on that train of righteousness with you, pulling the whistle loud and long.

I think that’s the point of controlling our complaining. My rant didn’t fix anything. It did lessen my psychic burden for a brief time. But my inner terrain was no better in the long run and it spread the negativity from me to someone else. I still have to deal with this situation and the person who caused it. I didn’t learn how to do that more successfully from my “sharing.”

Choices. We always have choices. And we must face the backflow of those choices.

Back to Day 1.